Along with the many changes teens experience on the road to adulthood, shifting friendships are some of the most dramatic and painful. It’s especially true for girls. While our daughters muddle through the social muck of middle and high school trying to figure out who’s a friend worth keeping and who is so not, they frequently attack each other in very personal ways.
We can thank technology, in part, for the ease with which today’s girls effectively bash and degrade their fellow students. But technology didn’t teach them that this stuff is OK. Could it be they’ve picked up some life lessons from the snarky remarks they’ve heard us make about other women? “My god! She got so fat!” “Whoah! She looks old!” “What happened to her? Is she wearing a mask?” Wait a minute, you say. Maybe those remarks are less than charitable, but they were aimed at celebrities… fair game. We certainly never trash talk anyone we actually know. Well, at least not to her face. But when our daughter has a “problem” with another girl, she is likely to go straight for the jugular.
No parents want to imagine that their sweet little girl would intentionally hurt anyone (no less a friend) but it happens… a lot! What also happens way too often is that girls who are targeted don’t have the courage to speak up for themselves. Which may explain why this friend-to-friend social aggression might be going on via text, IM and Facebook in your home without your knowing it.
In this week’s podcast I talk with Rosalind Wiseman, author of Queen Bees and Wannabes: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boyfriends, and the New Realities of Girl World which has just been re-released in a new edition covering the impact of technology on Girl World. Twice a New York Times bestseller, Queen Bees & Wannabes was the basis for the 2004 movie Mean Girls. Rosalind’s follow up book Queen Bee Moms and Kingpin Dads: Dealing with the Difficult Parents in Your Child’s Life was released in 2006.
Rosalind Wiseman is an internationally recognized expert on children, teens, parenting, bullying, social justice, and ethical leadership.
Listen to my interview with Rosalind Wiseman right here:
[QUICKTIME http://www.anniefox.com/podcast/FC013.m4a 300 300 false true]
If you have iTunes, you can subscribe to this podcast in the iTunes Store.
Or, you can download an MP3 version here.
Upcoming guests include:
Diane E. Levin, co-author (with Jean Kilbourne) of So Sexy So Soon: The New Sexualized Childhood And What Parents Can Do to Protect Their Kids
Susan M. Heim, author of It’s Twins! and Chicken Soup for the Soul Twins and More
Hannah Friedman, author of Everything Sucks: Losing My Mind and Finding Myself in a High School Quest for Cool
Dara Chadwick, author of You’d Be So Pretty If…
Matthew Amster-Burton, author of Hungry Monkey: A Food-Loving Father’s Quest to Raise an Adventurous Eater
*What’s a podcast? “A podcast is a series of digital media files, usually either digital audio or video, that is made available for download via web syndication.” –Wikipedia… So, in this case, there’s an audio file for you to listen to (in addition to reading the above).
Annie, this is a brilliant interview/podcast. I wish every parent could hear this – especially the part about “Truth or Dare,” sexting, and how important it is now for us to raise critically thinking kids who ask themselves “Why?” the *minute* they hear things like, “we’ve always done it this way,” or “everybody does it” and then spontaneously demonstrate the respect for self and others that will protect them at a time when digital technology seriously raises the stakes. Tx for posting this!
Comment by Anne Collier — December 8, 2009 @ 10:04 am
[…] that classic adolescent game of “Truth or Dare”? Well, in a recent “Family Confidential” podcast with educator and author Annie Fox, author of Queen Bees and Wannabes Rosalind Wiseman told Fox, […]
Pingback by Sexting: New Study and the ‘Truth or Dare’ Scenario « TodaysMama — January 19, 2010 @ 6:41 am
Hello and thanks for the great information.
Since we are writing on the same subject, let’s connect soon and share interviews.
Judy H Wright
Comment by Judy H Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship author and speaker — July 9, 2010 @ 7:56 pm
[…] Annie_Fox: Rosalind Wiseman rocks! My interview w/her http://blog.anniefox.com/2009/12/07/podcast-queen-bees-go-hi-tech/ […]
Pingback by SafetyWeb Twitter Party Transcript with 5MinutesforMom and Annie Fox #SafetyWeb | SafetyWeb Blog — September 27, 2010 @ 11:39 am
I love the great informations. Thank you!
Comment by Camila Schroeder — April 9, 2011 @ 9:55 pm
[…] that classic adolescent game of “Truth or Dare”? Well, in a recent “Family Confidential” podcast with educator and author Annie Fox, author of Queen Bees and Wannabes Rosalind Wiseman told Fox, […]
Pingback by Sexting: New study & the 'Truth or Dare' scenario - Connect Safely — April 20, 2013 @ 10:27 pm
[…] that classic adolescent game of “Truth or Dare”? Well, in a recent “Family Confidential” podcast with educator and author Annie Fox, author of Queen Bees and Wannabes Rosalind Wiseman told Fox, […]
Pingback by Sexting: New study & the 'Truth or Dare' scenario - NetFamilyNews.org | NetFamilyNews.org — February 25, 2014 @ 6:04 pm