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Annie Fox, M.Ed., is an internationally respected parenting expert, award-winning author, and a trusted online adviser for tweens and teens.

Olympic figure skaters got no trust issues

February 12, 2014

Confession time. My name is Annie and I’m a figure skating illiterate. No matter how many Winter Games I devour, I’ll never get the difference between a triple toe loop, sow cow, lutz or twizzle. Who cares? I’m hooked on all of the single skating events. Short. Long. Free. But when it comes to pairs… Wow! You get twice the beauty and fifty times the danger. Knife sharp blades this close to a serene face. Head with precious brain this close to rock hard ice.  And don’t slip past the improbability of survival when a guy balancing on 3/16 inch of steel, lifts a woman (albeit it a small one) overhead with one hand! Then seconds later, he catapults her into the stratosphere, where she spins one, two, three and a half times and (hopefully) lands with grace on a few toes, all the while smiling at him and gliding backwards.

Kirsten Moore-Towers.Dylan Moscovitch (AP)

Canadians Kirsten Moore-Towers and Dylan Moscovitch (AP)

How nuts is that and when can I see more?

Because relationships are my business, that’s the filter through which I see all human interactions. So when I’m watching the moves on the ice, I’m asking myself: How do the skaters develop the trust they need?

Maria Mukhortova and Maxim Trankov (2010 European Chamionships)

Maria Mukhortova and Maxim Trankov (2010 European Chamionships)

For the women, they need to be strong, solid, flexible and totally trusting of their partner’s ability to support them. When someone is holding your body upside down over their shoulders, that’s a whole new level of support, right?

For the men, they need to be a strong, solid, flexible and totally trustworthy partner, no distractions allowed. When you are balancing someone’s body over your head, with one hand, your cell phone better not be in your pocket.

Teachable moment: How do we teach our kids that trust is a two-way street? How do we show them are trustworthy people to others and trustworthy parents to them? How do we teach our kids to be trusting and trustworthy people in their relationship with us and with their peers?

I’ll trust you to think about that for a while, then you might want to have a conversation with your children.

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